Thursday, April 18, 2013

Dog Farts

Yes. Seriously. Let's have a deep meaningful post about dog farts. Here we go.
I have an 85 pound chubalub German shepherd that is getting up there in the dog years. I also have kids. It has been a running joke in the house, whenever someone farts, we blame the dog. Usually it's with a surprised outburst of her name, followed by relentless complaining. The dog has been trained to get up and leave the room whenever she hears a sound that even resembles a fart. ( nothing but the classy material here. ) She's old and fat now. So her getting up and leaving includes grunts and moaning that sounds like complaining. Funny stuff. Well, now the joke is on us. Now it really is her. She does it constantly. Nasty ones. Creepy sounding ones. Everyone get up and leave when she gets up for no apparent reason. It's awful. Sounds like a wet balloon deflating the last of the air.
My point? She got trained to respond to our reactions. Even though we were just playing around, she got trained to get up and leave whenever the air got thick. She somehow understood we were picking on her and now it's a regular reaction. We do the same thing. We have been trained our whole lives to respond certain ways to certain scenarios. We have developed a lot of pointless, maybe harmful, habits because of how people around us have responded. We have trained ourselves to do stuff that we honestly can't explain. .
During our marriage counseling, I learned that a high percentage of men can't hear anything corrective from a female. We have trained ourselves to cut her off, ignore her, imagine she is saying something else or just blocking her out completely. I did it. I had no idea I was doing it. I was guilty of letting my brain click over to autopilot whenever my wife tried to talk to me. I had developed a habit with no logical explanation.
There's other stuff, too. Arguing. I had developed a talent for arguing about everything. Even stuff that didn't matter. Just arguing for the sake of it. Stalling. She asked me to do things and I would intentionally put it off. At least for a few minutes. Maybe it was a control issue. Even stuff that I could have done right then with no extra effort. It was always, "give me a minute" or "sure" or "as soon as I get done with this." Most of the time I ended up not even doing it. Jerk. Stepping over things. Stuff on the floor, step over it and leave it for her. Spill something, leave it for her. Things that obviously need to be done, act like I didn't see it. Light bulbs burned out, clothes on the floor, trash can full, newspapers all over the driveway, empty milk jug in the fridge, dishes piled up in the sink, etc. etc. etc. Like every minute of my life was more important that hers. Like the extra 3 seconds it took to grab the clothes off the floor was a waste of my life. Sure, I can cram the trash down an inch and make it the next person's problem. No, I didn't notice any of that. Yeah. Jerk. Don't even mention that empty toilet paper roll. Most guys refuse to pull that empty tube off and put the new roll on. Why? Why do we train ourselves to avoid doing things when it takes almost the same effort to do it? We apparently don't understand the benefits of having our wives know that they are loved and respected by every little action. Most guys couldn't care less if they are using the toilet paper roll off the back of the toilet or off the holder. Doesn't matter to us. Most of us would be perfectly content to live out of the dryer and never hang or fold anything. We will gladly stand in front of an open refrigerator and eat dinner without using dishes. We are fine with just pulling dishes out of the dishwasher as we need them. All that stuff honestly makes sense to us. But not our wives. Why? They generally like order and structure. They like having things in their place. ( yes, there are always exceptions. ) They like for their home to be a sanctuary where there is peace. We see it as a place to drink beer and watch tv when we aren't working. Yep.
Guys, we need to change some of these habits. We need to put a little effort into seeing things from their perspective and figuring out what makes their world a happy place. Neglecting them and the things that matter to them creates these bad habits. Just like 85 pound chubalub dog farts, it's stuff we are better off without. Step up. Do right.

No comments:

Post a Comment